S Xo Presents Xanth: Ask the Good Magician!
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      Ask the Good Magician your question, and you shall recieve an answer. Of course, if you would like your question answered you must first pass 3 challenges. If you fail at these challenges, you will have to start all over again, so be careful!

      Some of the questions and answers have been hidden by Xo Webmasters to keep this main list entertaining and short, would you like to View only Hidden Questions & Answers?

Thanks to Xanthians who have helped with this section:
Foxy

Attempt to Enter the Castle

All Questions: (excluding hidden questions)

Q: "Why is your 5 1/2 wife only a 1/2 u married her no so why shouldnt she just be your 6th thx." Asks Medimayhemchrome.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "I cant keep track of it myself... How can we expect some mundane in Florida to keep track of it?" .

Q: " Who has the most powerful magician caliber talent? " inquires Tony, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "No single person has the most powerful talent because any talent can be thwarted or reversed by some means." .

Q: Xcalbier boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " (question)What do I do with my life now that I HAVE MOST ALMOST EVERYTHING I LOVE? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Help improve the lives of others, so that they dont have to bother me." .

Q: " (question)Please, Good Magician, if you would kindly answer my most dumb question,: who do you think has the strongest talent? " asks Infamousmagician after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "I do, why do you think people keep bothering me for information?" .

Q: Nimbysep walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " (question)GM I am sorry to bother you with this question again, but i am a little impatient, could you tell me where i might find any info on the possible upcoming movie A Spell for Chameleon ? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "The Mundane version of Com Pewter has a website (without spiders I presume) called Google where you can search for bits of information on pretty much anything. (I assume this Google is the Mundane version of a Good Magician)." .

Q: Will asks the Magician: " What would happen if a the demon X(a/n)th were to drink from a love spring with a unicorn drinking from it as well? "
A: "Do you think the Demon X(a/n)th would be subject to the human weakness of love?" the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: " What is my magic talent sir, I have read all 33 Xanth novels but have no clue." Asks brant.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Reading the Xanth series doesnt garner you a magic talent." .

Q: " If I truly believe, will I ever develop a magical talent that I can use if I ever find a way to Xanth?" inquires Tinkerbell, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "That depends on whether or not youd be willing to go to the lengths to obtain one." .

Q: Wakozacho9 boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " (question) Sir, every night when I go to bed a nightmare comes in. How can I get rid of it without moving?"
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Maybe its your guilty conscious that keeps the nightmares coming. Resolve your inner & outer conflicts & youll be at peace." .

Q: " (question)where is the enterance to Xanth? " asks Emmett after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "In the Mundane Southern state of Florida. You have to look for it though, it doesnt hang out in the open for anybody to find." .

Q: Gromden walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " Why has no one quested to chart out all the various magical springs in Xanth? I understand you would want to keep the Fountain of Youth a secret, but what about love and hate springs, or healing springs? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Lessons need to be learned & cross species wouldnt exist if everyone knew where to avoid." .

Q: Cresent asks the Magician: " what is my talent "
A: "You can sharpen pencils with your ear. It is your right ear only though, please refrain from putting the pencil in your left! Now, for your years service you will be working as my personal pencil sharpener. Sit in the corner of my library for the next year until I have a pencil to sharpen. I have to warn you, it can get sorta dull if you do not stay sharp." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: " why do you charge 1 year of service why not 99 years? " Asks nodopp.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "I would never get any work done if I had to do everything, & my wives would complain if they had to work all the time. One year is sufficient to maintain order in my castle as well as get querents out of my sight when Ive tired of dealing with them." .

Q: " (question)if a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear does it make a sound? " inquires nick, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Well it sure as hell wont make babies!" .

Q: Grundy24 boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " how do i nag the website people to upgrade the site a bit "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Wormy currently got in contact with the user, Znyrat, who he then made into a webmaster. She will be updating as soon as she can get some input from users on what theyd like to see on Xanthians. Be patient though! Some webmasters have lives though & have a lot of work & schooling to do." .

Q: " i am a human i lived near the sea but moved away do i have powers i believe in magic and so want to know if i do " asks Salmon_ella after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "If youve moved away from the border of Xanth, as I assume that is where you previously lived, than your magic talent would become hidden, but it would never leave you entirely. Its just not possible to use it in Mundania w/o Arnolde Centaur, who can create a aisle of magic outside Xanth, & also, when carrying reverse wood, can create an aisle of non-magic inside Xanth." .

Q: Sean walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " Are demon children subject to the adult conspiracy? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "All children are subject to the Adult Conspiracy, but demons are on their own wavelength & control their young as they see fit. Do you recall when D. Metria changes to Woe Betide, & Woe cannot swear or isnt aware of what the Adult Conspiracy contains?" .

Q: Ivychas asks the Magician: " Will anyone from Xanth come to visit me in Iowa? "
A: "I highly doubt it. Would you want to leave Xanth to visit Mundania? Cheer up though, you can always visit Xanth if you take the time to find the entrance." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: " (question)how do get to xanth from mundainia because I left and cant find my way back in. " Asks Nimby465.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Difficult to re-enter once youve left. You have to go into a secluded part of the Mundane state of Florida & poke around. Its not easily found as anybody can enter nowadays. You have to be patient as well, because the hunt for Xanth is worth every second once youre back." .

Q: " How can I be a good Magician? " inquires Zack, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Learn all you can about magic & the people who inhabit Xanth, as well as Mundania. You have to know about foreigners in order to control how they cross into Xanth proper." .

Q: Chives boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " This might seem silly, but who created the Adult Conspiricy? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "It is unknown who exactly created it, but the current theory is Ivy, Idas twin sister, informed her it existed and because Idas talent had not manifested, the Adult conspircy came to be, retroactivly even." .

Q: " Where is the Tree of seeds? " asks Shining_dragon after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "Mount Parnassus, of course, where the Simurgh resides." .

Q: Jamesdagommir walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " i think that my name is james idhham dagommir. However, due to a ceratin magic, whenever i say my name aloud, the letters come out as majid mohammed saghir. now im confused...am i majid,or am i james? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "As far as I can tell, your name is Jammie Moghadam Shird... Weird huh? " .

Q: Coolcat18 asks the Magician: " what is a shoefly pie? "
A: "it is a huge pie filled with shoes, boots, slurpy leathery juices, delicious laces and soles. Ogres are very fond of them" the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: " Why are you always so grumpy? " Asks Oblivionxx.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Because People ask me dumb questions" .

Q: " (question)good magian I am sory to bother you with this mudane question, but did they ever make the movie A Spell for Chameleon ? " inquires Nimbysep, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "It is currently in production, as far as I can tell through the Haze of Mundania. My best geuss puts it out in 2011, but I have no confident answer at this time." .

Q: Nimbysep boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "My sons and i are great fans of xanth,and want to know if you see us ever owning all the books again, we lost our old ones due to theft "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "I am not a clairvoyent, but, if you put in enough effort, Yes, it is possible." .

Q: " (question) Is it possible for a person to have two talents? I know that centaurs can make themselves light as well as have a completely different talent so why not humans? And if it is possible to have a person with 2 talents would it be possible for a wave of people to have two talents? " asks Kon after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "No it is not possible for someone to have two entirely differnet talents. But one can have a talent with many facets. Flying centuars ALL have the abillity to make themselves light, and therefore it is not a talent. And as was explained to suprise Golem, there is an infinite number of ways to describe a talent. One can fly be repelling the Earth, Attracting the Moon, reducing weight, making air solid, etc. So it is possible for people tio appear to have the same Talent, but not quite" .

Q: Stark walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " GM i need to no how to stop my friend from hurting some one with his powers?he has the talent of mimicing and he can remember any thing he has ever mimiced. at first his talent was a little above spot on the wall but now that he has used his talent for a few years hes is more powerfull then a magician. and the power went to his head. how can i stop him? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "A bit of Lethe water will make him forget all he has previously mimicked. Dont forget to have the antidote for yourself" .

Q: Mdrew93 asks the Magician: "can talents repeat? king Xeth had the talent of mind reading and so did Prince jermey of the werewolves (jenny elfs wife), but no one in that book said, hey i thought talents never repeat! so did the talents repeat or not? "
A: "Talents can not EXACTLY repeat. Its possible, how ever, for the EFFECTS of talents be simmilar. Its like if you talent was to make wooden things into stone and your friend rocky could turn anything into stone, both of you could petrify, but its not the same thing. Look into Surprise Golems Talent for a deeper explanation. " the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "How can we sneak into your castle without facing the three challenges? " Asks Quinquagen.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "You have 3 chances to figure it out. They go by the name of challenges. In short, no. Although I have been known to give out free answer passes before." .

Q: " What is the order of birth of the muses? " inquires Xeno_cre8or, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Calliope, Erato, Euterpe, Melpomene, Polyhymenia, Terpsichore, Thalia, Urania, and then Clio." .

Q: mdrew93 boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " If the magic is really in the magic dust that X(A/N)th produces, why did the time of no magic occur when the dust was still present? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Because X(A/N)th withdrew all his magic to hisself. Now go prove the exsitance of magical dust bunnies" .

Q: " if the demon X(A/N)th has the quality of magic, do all the other demons of the system have the quality of gravity? " asks mdrew93 after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "Only E(A/R)th has this abillity. Discover the others for yourself in Swell Foop. GO" .

Q: Stark walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "GM i was wondering if Ida will ever marry? i feel kinda sorry for her shes been stuck in her little room at the castle for so long now. "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Im sure she will, but it will take a man with a very special talent to match with her. Wait for her or him to be a protagionist." .

Q: Katrika asks the Magician: " Does your castle automatically adjust the challenges to the talent of the person trying to get in, or does someone else design the challenges? "
A: "Each and every Challenge is designed personally by me. I do not, however, move every scrap and scarpe of my castle. I had a herd a centaurs build it for me and it does a lot of the adjusting. The only time it is not so is when I am on vacation. Now, Go and shift that immense pile of sand using only these tweasers." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: " Oh, great and powerful Good Magician, I bear greetings and politely request an answer to the following question: In the land of Xanth there is a boy commonly known as Demon Ted, son of demoness Metria. What is his talent? " Asks Ted.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "He is a demon. demnons, as of now, do not posess talents. No go and ask D. Metria if you can help babysit" .

Q: "How many types of cross breeds can there be between all of the creatures of Xath? " inquires Amber_dawn, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Ill tell you after you tell me how many total numbers there are from one to infinity" .

Q: Mattwandcow boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "Are the questions working? for a minute it seemed like they did not... "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Maybe. Test" .

Q: "How do you get past the moat in the three challenges game? " asks Xink after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "You dont" .

Q: Quinquagen walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "Will you marry me? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Madame! I already have Five and a half wives! Why would I need another??" .

Q: King_trent asks the Magician: "How can I become king of Xanth? "
A: "Have a Magichan Calibur talent and be in line for the throne. Duh." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "Hello.... I am Rieyeciu Black but most call me Rie. I came to ask a question but when I got here my question seem of been miss place. Therefore, I ask a different one thought its one you heard many time before form other people that come to ask you things...... Hum ... What is my magic talent? Thanks for your time ? " Asks Rieyeciu.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "On behalf of your previous question, I queried Miss Place as to the whereabouts of your question. As usual, My secretary claims to have lost it. So, do to this clerical error, you are only required to serve a 3/4 year service. Your talent is to inadvertently summon Miss Place to lose things for you. Now, Your service will be to aid My secretary in sorting all of these questions. " .

Q: " Why dont you get off you lazy butt every once in a while and clean your own socks?(asking for brother)" inquires Ragnarok347, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "What! Does your brother read the Chronicles? I am a busy man! I have no time for socks! Thats WHY I have Sophia as my wife! His task is to give my Wives a break and clean and sort my socks!" .

Q: Ragnarok347 boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "Will we ever find out what happened to DEarth after swell floop? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "I assume he survived, as the earth seems to be in existence. Our best estimates are, worst case, he lost some status, best case nothing, as it wasnt an official game." .

Q: " Why do we continue to accept the degradation of our society simply because someone believes that God should be separate from everything else? " asks Usmcdad75 after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "I am unsure as how to respond. My lexicon has no mention of this God. I dont believe he has any grounds to be mentioned in the land of Xanth. As such, Ill leave you with no task. Be gone and ask questions only to those who have the authority to answer." .

Q: Jamie walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "Good Magician, where did the Brain Coral come from? Did it simply form from nothing, as a manifestation of the magic given off by the Demon X(A/N)th? Or could it have been created- or at least granted sentience- by a long faded-out Magician in Xanths prehistory? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Nothing ever forms from nothing. The secret to the Brain Coral is to be kept for a while longer at lease. A message sent to the Mundane ANthony of Peirs may help speed the mater along" .

Q: Julie asks the Magician: " Oh wize Good Magician, please tell me what my talent is? "
A: "Your talent is substitution. with practice and training, youll be able to turn Cats to Hats, Fish to Fist, and Wize back into Wise. Your task will be to turn a Turnip into a Dragon in less than 22 steps." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "I am an invisable zombie. What do I look like? " Asks Xzighct.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "You look like a spitting image of the Invisible Giants. I advise you to look them up. Your service to me will be to give the giants a good cleaning between the toes. As your a zombie, the smell wont kill you, just melt your flesh a little..." .

Q: "What do I most need from this life? " inquires Jtrecha, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "A banana. Always carry one with you." .

Q: Statue_of_limitations boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " What is the Meaning of Life? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Heres a Freebie. 42. No go and find the question" .

Q: "what is my magic talent and its caliber? " asks Domth after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "You fire bulletins. Id rate you at a twelve gauge. You task is to distribute this newsletter about my powers. Go." .

Q: Totalydragon walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " Good Magician, when will i start my first adventure and who will it be with? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Youll leave right now and youll find the rest out as you go." .

Q: Jonnyblade21 asks the Magician: " how do i get rid of the evil monkey that lurks in my closet "
A: "Feed it a Good Banana." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "What is my talent? I think it has something to do with puppets, considering my name, but I am not sure. " Asks Peppit.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Your talent is slight ventriloquism. You can throw your voice to things close by you, but the range is very limited. Now, Maiden Taiwan needs help mending some of my socks. Off with you." .

Q: "I was wondering, Good Magician Humphrey, what is a good question to ask you?" inquires Inphernoh, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "A good question to ask me would be whether or not you will wind up doing an unpleasant chore or not in the near future. Head down to the moat. I need it drained and cleaned up. The moat monster hasnt had a bath in a long time, either." .

Q: Jenny boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "Ive tried to download the companions game, but it wont work, is there another way to install game? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Please refer to the installation instructions included on this site. All questions of this nature must be forwarded via sitemail to Wormy and the other Webmasters. This is the only readibly available place to get this game. " .

Q: "Ymay istersay (hattay arpyhay) ashay ursedcay emay otay ommunicatecay niay igpay atinlay owhay ancay I urecay histay? " asks Blaze5186 after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "Itray eakingspay inay igpay atinlay. ependingday onay ethay ursecay eshay astcay, itay aymay omecay outay ormalnay. Alsoay, oneay ouldcay itray istingvay ethay oorsehay octorday. Ehay isay ellway udiedstay inay iseasesday and ursescay ofay ethay ootfay anday outhmay. " .

Q: Magician_madison walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " If your so smart, how come you never realised that king Merlins talent is of knowledge, which is in fact the same as information and even if it wasnt it isnt even your real talent; you just happen to get the title when you won your certificate at the U.O.M.?! "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Who ever told you that knowledge is the same as information should be dragged out into the street and cursed just as a flaming pile of harpy excrement is disposed of into his exact location. Knowledge and Information are related, but are not the same. Knowledge is based of personal experience, and is completely internal. This may lead to a richer experience, but information, in the other sock, encompasses the entire world. Information must be processed, assimilated, translated, related, and compensated, but it does span a larger area. Knowledge needs none of that, but is directly yours. Merlin was a Magician of Knowledge only because he lived in several temporal directions at once. My talent , as the Magician of Information is, metaphorically, the digestion of information in its raw form and adding it to my book. And Id like to see your certificate from UoM. Havent got one? Funny. You made it sound as if they were easy to get... " .

Q: Vampgirl15000 asks the Magician: "Is there a way to play Companions of Xanth without downloading or buying it? My parents dont like me downloading things and I would like to play. "
A: "I do not believe such a method exists. One must either download it or not play, aas I have yet to find it elsewhere." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "How do I solve simple problems quickly without giving up accuracy? " Asks jon stewart.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Find the most practical response and go with what you feel is right. Intuition is often a valuable tool to use. Please visit the Gorgon. Shell show you to the library so you can organize all of my books." .

Q: "Suprise! Talents are awesome no matter what! I know most good citizens of Xanth have magical talents and I was wondering, what would mine be? " inquires Dorkydivia89, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Your talent is Summoning Bs. Now go gather me several gallons of B-have honey for the Queen. Go. " .

Q: Totalydragon boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "Good Magician, what race am I? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "This answer should be quite obvious, even to you. You are the crossbreed of a dragon and a human. Now, go up to the attic and get rid of the spider webs. Theyve started to clutter the place." .

Q: " I know the is kinda backsliding, but Grundy golems been around, like, FOREVER. How old is he??? " asks Beckadragongirl after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "This answer depens on your finitions of age and of time. If you want how long he has been alive, then you want to base his birth off of the end of the time of no magic. If you want when he is constructed, then we have to go back several hundred years to when I had him constructed. I forget exactly when. And, since time functions differently, I connot be sure of your frame of reference to give you a good estimate of his age. " .

Q: geekygoddess23 walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "Where can I find my Mr. Right? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "like all things, Mr. Right will appear as soon as you count on not being able to finsd him, ever. No amount of searching will make him apear, so you might as well stop, focus on other thngs and learn to live life. Thats your task. Go." .

Q: Sundancer asks the Magician: "Please dont get your knickers in a knot if you have answered this before :) but I was wondering if Ivys talent is so good why when she enhanced Hugos ability to conjured up fruit ( Dragon on a Pedestal), after they parted he could not keep doing it, once he was enhanced wouldnt he have stayed enhanced? Thank You,,, Nada Z "
A: "Ivys enhancement is her talent and thus would have to be in her range or even her constant focus. Very rarely does a talent that modifies the surrounding become automatically permanent. Also, I do not believe Ive answered this before. It is an excellent question which deserves an excellent service. Go poll Xanth and find the difinition of constant. " the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "How many ptero like planets are there? " Asks Domth.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "I do believe I have answered this recently before. Yes, I gave the answer to BeckaDragonGirl, when he asked, How many bleeping worlds of Ida are there? I do believe I gave a satisfactory answer. Your task is to reread all the Answers so you have not missed anything. Go." .

Q: "What is the difference between a Hayberry and a Strawberry, because they dont clarify it in the books? " inquires Trapped_in_gourd, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Strawberries come from the dried stalks and stems of certain cereal plants, whereas hayberries come from dried grass. Now, visit the dungeon and clean out the rats. Theyve started a nest down there." .

Q: Trapped_in_reality boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "What is the most intelligent and fierce creature in all of Xanth? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Besides Demon X(A/N)th and the Simurgh, some dragons are perhaps the fiercest and more intelligent creatures in Xanth." .

Q: "If the demon X(A/n)th is the source of magic in Xanth why isnt Mundania magical to because of the demon E(A/R)th? " asks Pie_tree_lover after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "A valid and easy question. Each DEMON has a force that they monopolize. X(A/N)th is the Demon of Magic. E(A/R)th has dominion over gravity. The History entitled Swell Foop has more information. Go away. These Easy Questions arent worth my time." .

Q: Alan walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "I am here in heart alone, and wish to travel to Xanth. How may I come to this land in body?"
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Read over my previous answers. I have answered this before." .

Q: Pie_tree_lover asks the Magician: "Is there any way to change a talent? "
A: "Yes, there are waysd to change a talent. The most common, easiest, though not at all best, is to make a deal with a demon. Good luck with that. Your task is to list 47&1/2 reasons at to why you should NOT trade your talent. Go." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "So in the situation that a Mundane utterly believes in Xanth would the faith units reqired to access the interface, and that Demons would have no reason to bar entrance to Xanth, as Demon X(A/N)ths atitude toward Bink suggests, therefore, if the penninsula to be used as an interface was sufficient size, the variables would allow the Mundane(s) to enter Xanth because maximum faith should be the required faith units needed to activate the interface? " Asks Trapped_in_gourd.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Once again, possibly. One must also consider that there are more then one Demon. Demon E(A/R)th already has claim on Mundanes and other Demons might be interfering. Other then these, yes, it may be possible to enter Xanth proper. Hows that list of penninsulas coming?" .

Q: "Oh, Mighty Good Magician, Knower of All, I Bestow This Extremly Easy seeming Question Upon You: When the Demon X(A/N)th used Edsels body in Xone Of Contention, Why didnt all the magic travel to him? " inquires Beckadragongirl, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Once again another amazing question. X(A/N)th only used a small portion of his power. Thats why he was able to use abillities that Edsel didnt have. This is also why E(A/R)th detected the two of them." .

Q: Trapped_in_gourd boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "Coencerning my question of the peninsula, if a Mundane or group of Mundanes who truly believe in Xanth, travel to a previously uninhabited peninsula, will they go to Xanth if they use the place where the Xanth/Mundania interface will be? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "It is possible, but highly unlikely. If you remember all the variables, there are several that one can never be to sure of. For Example. If you were to travel to Florida to bridge the connection, the size of the area would be 6.31657078 ? 10^13 Square Feet. (A) I assume you have not been to Xanth before, so previous encounter (P)=0, Interference by Demons is an Unknown,(D). Well call it 0 for Demon-stration purposes. We also have Faith (F). This is a factor greater than 0, but the full value of it is unknown. Do you really believe we Exist? Continuing: The Equation to find the Interface Factor is therefore I=F/A+D-P. In this instance we can plug in the variables we know: I=F/6.31657078 ? 10^13+0-0 I=F/6.31657078 ? 10^13 Now If the required Interface is 1, then the total Faith in Xanth you need is 6.31657078 ? 10^13, which is a lot. Having friends who share the dream does not linearly increase F. F(2)=P1+P2+c F(3)=P1+P2+P3+c... Where F(x) is the combined faith of X people, P1 is the strength of person one and so on, and C is the Interface Constant, being the number of Xanth Books currently Published, currently 30, by my count. Therefore, barring any Demon interference, it IS possible to come in, but it would take somewhere around 6.31657078 ? 10^13 Faith units.. Faith units are hard to explain. Lets just say you have around 18. Therefore, it would take 3,509,205,988,888 people with your faith to force their way into Xanth. Very unlikely, as there arent that many people in the mundane world. Good luck with that." .

Q: "How long do we have before the Demon X(A/N)th leaves and Xanth loses its magic? " asks Pie_tree_lover after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "It is unknown how long we have till X(A/N)th departs. My best estimate from conversations with various experts show that there may be minutes or millenia. I suggest you live life to its fullest and enjoy the varietyof magical experience. Speaking of variety, bring me a branch from all the Magical trees on this list. Go." .

Q: Trapped_in_gourd walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " How is it that crunch ogre could talk in rhymes in the time of no magic and smash ogre could not in mundania? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Ogres dont speak in rhymes. They are just percieved as being so stupid that all others assume they speak in rhyming couplets. Those near Smash knew he was intelligent, while those around Crunch thought he was stupid. That is the most readily available answer. Now your task is to go to Counter-Xanth and create a list of Counter-Puns for some of the more obnoxious puns. Go." .

Q: Trapped_in_gourd asks the Magician: " Well, here i am! you told me to get through the challenges again, so... where are all the Xanth/Mundania interfaces from the Mundane point of view. (example: florida, korea, etc.) "
A: "Hmph. Cheeky little upstart. It varies with the following criteria and thus cannot be completely listed. For each peninsula under Demon E(A/R)ths control, the Interface factor is inversely related to the size of the peninsula, directly related to the interfacers belief in Xanth, decremented by the Interfacers previous knowledge and adventure in Xanth and incremented by the interactions of Higher Powers to prevent entrance to Xanth. Your service will be to calculate the size of each peninsula on the face of Earth. Go." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "Good Magician whats my magic talent?" Asks Totalydragon.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "WHAT!?!! I already told you your talent is the Magic of Time Observation! Now you must spend a Year figuring out how to make it into a WEEK!. " .

Q: "What is my talent? " inquires Nimby465, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Your Talent is animation. You can bring pictures to life. Your Service is to find the Rame Frate, for the good of animators everywhere. Go." .

Q: Nimby465 boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "Why did my girl friend Kat break up with me? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Probably because you dwell to much in fantasy. I cant be certain, because no one knows a females mind. She doesnt even know!" .

Q: "how do i nutrilize a demon? " asks Domth after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "I expect one will nutrilize a deamon by squeezing nutrills over its head? Go spend your year extracting spell honey from the spelling bees. Then maybe you may ask what you really mean." .

Q: Domth walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " how can i gain recognition as prince dolphs twin "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Hmm. Quite frankly, you cant. King Dor and Queen Irene Had their hands so full from Ivy and Dolph that they sent a message telling them to ignore all stork calls from them. There is no time reported in the Stork Records that such a summoning took place. It may be possible that you are from Petro or on of the other moons. As such, you may be a twin to Dolph. Bt as for the real Xanth world, there does not appear to be such a missing relation." .

Q: Tandy asks the Magician: "Id like to know what my magic talent is..."
A: "Dont you know your supposed to ask a question? Humph. Kids these days. Your Talent is the arguement. If you state your position with enough information, then others will be able to see you point of view." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "Is my talent magician class talent and if so what is it? If not could you tell me anyway please? " Asks Totalydragon.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Your talent is a Magichan Class Talent. It is the Magic of Time Observation. You can track how long a task takes. Knowing that fact, you can make people do it faster or slower. Your task is to spend a Year figuring out how to make it into a month. Go." .

Q: "What is my talent? " inquires Pie_tree_lover, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Your talent is Fruit Sculpture. You can form various fruits into works of art. Your task will be to create for me a replica of Xanth done in fruit. Wira will show you the blue prints. You may leave once it is completed." .

Q: Beckadragongirl boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " How come the Bleeping Chat room wont work? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Most likely because you attempt to break the Adult Conspiracy so often. I advise you to talk to those who are smart in the way of such things. Maybe you colud leave a disriptive message on one of the fourms. Dilegence is your watchward here. Your task is to get your chat working, so you can see how much it isnt worth the effort." .

Q: "How many bleeping worlds of Ida are there, Good Magician sir? Please tell me, for I shall dissolve into misery if I dont know. " asks Beckadragongirl after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "No one has been able to trace all the moons. It acts as a fractal, growing smaller and more intricate with each iteration. There will never be an end, because the size of the soul get exponetially smaller with each world, but the world gets smaller with each step. The ration of person to world is maintained, therefore there will always be another Ida with another world to be explored. Since you asked a decent question, there shall be no task, Beckadragongirl..." .

Q: Quinquagen walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "Would you summon the stork with me ? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "No I would not! Wh is it that 15 yearold males only have one thin on thir brain? do you ask you friends that? I think not. Your Task for asking such a disgusting question is to clean all the latrines from Ithmus village to the Everglades! GO!" .

Q: Demoness_jewel asks the Magician: "As a demoness I know that I have many talents however each demon and demoness has one thing that he or she really good at. So I must ask what is my special talent? "
A: "Well, D.Jewel. Im surprised you havent figured it out! Your speciality is to be able to remove finary from an object, making them/it appear without any augmentation. Your Task is to be a teachers assistant for Professor Grossclout. Go." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "Why havent you been answering questions?" Asks trapped_in_gourd.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "I havnt been answering questions because no one seems to be able to get throught my challenges. Your task is to find the way through. Again..." .

Q: " I was traveling through time, you know just for fun, when I noticed your castle, Good Magician. I heard you could answer me this question that has been burning my soul...How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck wood? " inquires Chronos, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "After long and exhausting research, the Answer is... three. Now your task is to duplicate my reseach and compile it in a twelve page essay with my name on it. Make sure to cite your sources." .

Q: Trapped_in_guord boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " Hello, GM me and my friend were role-playing adventures and my friend and I so could you tell me what my talent is? (maybe my friends Tanners talent too, even though its two questions, please) "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Your talent is the Mark. You can leave a mark that everyone will be able to interpret. Your friend Tanner has the Talent of Pestering. He can annoy people to the point that the depart form his presence. Your Year of Service is to clear out some of the campsites and leave a Mark so all know it is a neutral zone. Both of you must work together on this. Go." .

Q: "How do I make my kids love Xanth as much as I do when all they read is the manga books which are backwards?lol " asks Rebornstubborn after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "The best way would be to show them that best way would be to demonstate the fact that there are more cheap thrills in forward facing books then in rearward ones. Yopur task is to introduce GOOD books to as many kids as possible. Thank you for asking a GOOD question." .

Q: Anndes walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " Hi, Magician! What is my talent? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "You have the Talent of Flooring. You can summon tiles of any size and color that fit perfectly, are easy to install, dont get to hot or cold and magically look right. Theyre waterproof, stainproof and fire proof. Now go and service the floors of the whole castle. Go." .

Q: Gimble asks the Magician: "What would my talent be? "
A: "Your talent is Finding Lost Objects. You can use this to find something that you consider to be lost, like your keys. Now I want you to find 100 lost causes. Their crucial to the surival of my privacy. " the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "Could a demon ever truly love? " Asks Gimble.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "To love, one needs a soul. Demons gain a soul by marrying their partner before stork summoning. So one way to look at: yes, with certain conditions. Now you must go to the demon caves and count all the deamons that exist." .

Q: "Aanjel respectfully asks the GM how do I discover my majical talent?" inquires Aanjel, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "By asking me, if you really do not know. Fine. Your talent the the Third Person POV. People around you tend to drift into third person. This lets them see thing from a different perspective and lets them remain in character, if nesscary. Sadly, the Good Magichan says, it gets annoying. The Good Magichan points his finger at the door. Now go monitor the RP fourms. Maybe youll be able to keep them in third person, a much better format four such games." .

Q: God_dess_of_fire boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "Will Xanth and Mundania ever overlap as in the Blue Adept Series? Oh Please, oh please.!!! "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "If you were half the fan you think you are, you would know that the crossover has already occured. As penence... I mean service, you must read the last book of the Xanthian Trilogy" .

Q: "How c/d King Dor+Queen Irean name their son Dolph?,(when in Dragon on a Petisle) Ivys name was decided by Ireans first inistial and talent. Plus how does it connect to Dors talent? Also, i was wondering on how to literally enter Xanth(not speaking retoracally,but for real). " asks Sor after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "My sources tell me Dolph was named because the first animal that he transformed into that started with a D was a Dolph, a finny creature that lives in the see off the Ivory Tower. To enter Xanth, one must have a near or complete death experience while traveling on a peninsula. One may also get through by petitioning X(A/N)th himself. Good luck with that though. You task for these questions is two fold. First, create a list with all the Pennenuslas of E(A/R)th. Second, strive to never have a near/complete death experience." .

Q: Sor walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "How would I be able to go into Xanth and marry Electra(Xanth 11, 12,and 13)? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "You would have to have magically found a way to replace yourself with Domph as the one who woke her up. I wont tell you how to do that because you would screw up the entire history of Xanth. Clio would write you out of existance for that." .

Q: Burfrio asks the Magician: "My talent being able to cojure areas of frigid cold. I am here to ask you Good Magician, where can I find a place in Xanth so that I may live peacefully in the cold without harming other people that do not want to live in the cold themselves? "
A: "Hmm. Excellent question. First you must realize that there ARE those who like the cold. I would also note that your Talent would be useful at any large get together, to provide chlled drinks and the like. You may also want to seek out the Ice Queen. No one has heard from her in ages, but, I dare say, she would not give the... cold shoulder. Now your Years service will be to freeze the moat completly for Challenges when needed. Wira will lead you to your room. " the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "What is my talent? " Asks Good King Dor.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Your talent is to Make Amends. These useful devices can be snapped to resolve a conflict between the snapper and who ever (s)hes fighting. Now go and make an amend for each of the main characters, free of charge. Go." .

Q: "What is my magic talent?" inquires Luke, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Your magic talent is turning vegetables into dining tables. Vegetables rot quite easily and arent very long lasting, so your talent helps preserve them. Careful, though. It you wont watch yourself, those tables might just have you for dinner. Now, go down to my garden and pull out the weeds. Be careful, though. There are some nastic ant-tics in there that like to pull tricks." .

Q: Trebawa boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "I live in Xanth (on the Gold Coast in fact), so I must have a talent? What is it? I am prepared to perform my Service. "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Trebawa, your talent is making old coats into new pants of any shape, size, or variety. That talent could come in handy for people who want to throw out worn jackets and vests theyve grown tired of. For your Service, you are to clean out all the dust bunnies that seem to have wandered under all of our furniture. They can get out of hand and seem to mulitply quite rapidly." .

Q: "what is my talent? " asks teddy after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "Your talent is staring holes through walls. Now, run off and clean out my closet, please." .

Q: Laugha_bull walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "Ive always wondered what my magic talent is. I know, I know, you get that question all the time...so heres a different one. Do the cri-tics criticize everything, or only Xanth? I would guess the latter, because they are such spiteful creatures... "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Cri-tics criticize just as many things in Mundania as in Xanth. Except, they are more critical usually and have larger egos than those of Xanth." .

Q: Johnc asks the Magician: "How is it possible to kill the Demon X(A/N)th? "
A: "No mortal can kill a Demon, nor any demon. The only ones that can really harm Demon X(A/N)th would be another major Demon, such as E(A/R)th. They usually dont go about killing each other, however. They prefer to use they powers when competing with each other." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "Hello Good Magician, I am Harrow, and Im sure I have a talent, because I was born in xanth, and Im sure it has some connection with my name, but so far, I cant find it. Will you help me? " Asks Harrow.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Your talent brainscaping. You have the ability to change peoples minds for a few minutes, giving them distress, different feelings, momentary changes of memory, and so forth. However, you are limited in the aspect that you must be touching the person." .

Q: "What is my magic talent? " inquires Princess_al, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "You have the talent of making animate objects out of the mundance. For example, you can make a golem, much like Grundy, out of cloth and string, or if you had the right materials, you could make a dancing doll. Now, Id like you to clean out my closet. Watch out for the Boogey Monster. He likes to dance around a lot and is a little slimey." .

Q: Damien boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "I wonder Good Magician... If I plant a whole pie instead of a piece, will the tree grow bigger? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "I would think so, yes. It would act as a larger seed. Of course, it may also take more time to grow than a piece would. For your service, you are required to pick the fruits which are ripening in the orchard before they begin flying off." .

Q: "If I have a magical talent, what is it? " asks Miranda Mermaid after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "Your talent is being able to tune any sounds you hear, changing their tone, pitch, and dynamics into what you want. For example, if you hear the nasty cackle of a harpy, you can alter the sound to be heard as the pretty, sing-song tone of a trilling bird to you and everyone around you. Now, if you could, Id like you to retune the rose bells. They are a little off-key." .

Q: Jay Winderson walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " ood day mate. I know I got magician caliber material magic in me, I just dont know what talent I got. Can you tell me my talent? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Yes, I am capable of telling you your talent. I have the ability to, but I have a question for you, sir. How do you know your talent is magician caliber without knowing what that talent is? Ill tell you. Your magic talent is knowing the opposite history of anyone who come across. This is a very useful talent, if you know how to work it out. Knowing the opposite history means that it isnt right, so you take the opposite of that and it should be right. Or, if you were to come across a piece of reverse wood, your talent would be knowing the history of anyTHING you come across. Quite a useful talent. Your service to me will be cataloging all of my socks by size, shape, and color." .

Q: Autumn_daydream95 asks the Magician: "Can you tell me what my magical talent is? "
A: "Your magical talent is to change the color of vegetation. Your talent will come in handy for your service. Ive been informed that an trees leaves have been changed blue, making the trees dryad incredibly sad and depressed. If you would change the trees color back to another color or their original color, Im sure shed be incredibly thankful." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "Back when Anomie was the Dastard, he came upon Surprise, who, at that time, had realized that after some time, she would be able to use a talent again. He undid her memory of that. Will she ever re-learn this fact? No...scratch that...Will any un-doings the Dastard did (such as Surprise and Sorceress Tapis) be possible to redo? " Asks Isenet.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "As The Dastard, or Anomie, stated in the book, his unhappenings usually cannot be unhappened because most usual people dont know what had been unhappened or if the thing unhappened ever exhisted. However, perhaps in the future, his unhappenings may be unhappened. As to Surprise, she may not remember that she could reuse a talent after time. Clio helped me out, though (Currant Event) and told Surprise that she could never run out of talents since there would always be too many variants of different talents. She wouldnt be able to do them all in her life-time. Now that your question has been answered, I need you to dust the living area. My Designated Wife has been too busy with other things to attend to it." .

Q: "How come the main character of the Xanth books are never dragons? " inquires Peter_the_wolf, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "There have been many main characters in Xanth Books that are dragons. Not not be the major main character, but they are minor main characters and needed for the story. For example, in Dragon on a Pedestal, Stanley Steamer is a main character whom the plot of the book wraps around and in Currant Event, Drew and Drusie Dragon of Dragon World are two main characters as well. However, to answer you question a little more, Im not sure why a dragon hasnt been a major main character. Perhaps one hasnt mustered up the attributes needed to make that slot. Mr. Anthony could be waiting for the right time. Now, I want you to go clean out the dragons den down in the dungeon. It gets pretty mucky down there." .

Q: Magician-yin boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " What is the talent of my son, Kumalis? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "The talent of your son is to summon clouds every time he gets angry or hot-headed. Now, pick up my dry cleaning and be gone. Im in a slightly-tolerant mood today." .

Q: "If humans werent meant to fly, why did we build airplanes? And if we have the technology to build complex mechanisms such as airplanes, why cant we build wings for humans? " asks Nejixashley after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "Youre lucky Im in a good mood, else I wouldnt be answering both of your questions. Humans in the Mundania built aircraft because they were jealous of all the flying monsters and wanted to experience flight for themselves, so they built contraptions to allow such. Now, as for your last question: there have been wings built for humans. They call it a glider. Its used in a called hanggliding where the person hangs from this odd looking device to emulate flight much like a falcon soaring on thermals. They also have an object called a parachute which is also similar. Mundanes come up with such silly things. Now, your Service to to write me a book of riddles for the next Questionee." .

Q: Artemesiak walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "Will there ever be a solution to the ever-growing problem of mundanes and Xanthians alike - the inability to spell or use proper grammar when using com-pewters and writing on the interweb? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Unfortunately, this problem will continue to increase as this virus runs rampant. Some people have been vaccinated against this outbreak, but many havent. Magic nor Mundanian science may be able to cure this problem in the near future, so the answer to your question is this: Only can the threat be abolished if people strive to look intelligent. Now, your Service to me shall be to fetch some more dragon eggs. The fool who asked the last question broke one while he was egg-sitting." .

Q: John cena asks the Magician: "Hello Humphrey. I am the Good Inspector. Its my job to see who does not have sufficient license, and to revoke it. To prove that you are still fit for the post of GM, answer this elementary question that you as the GM must know. What came first the chicken or the egg? "
A: "What kind of non-sense is this? What a bother of my time and a waste of resources. To begin with, why do you bring up a mundane animal. They are so drear and boring. To suit your question, I will answer like this: It is a paradox. The egg cannot be without the chicken laying it, but the chicken cannot lay it if there were no egg for it to come from. It is a neverending cycle that only someone with a degree in something Mundians call Quantum Mechanics could answer, but then there would be a bunch of silly things most could not possibly begin to understand. Now, for such a bombastic question, you are to sit on the eggs downstairs and ponder why the chicken crossed the road. No breaking the eggs, though. The dragon mother might become very angry with you." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "Hi, Im Binks little brother Wink. I fell in love with Mink. Love is that missinng link which I share with darling Mink. Heres something to think, man I think Im gonna sink. I want to form that link, but Im on the brink of heart break. If you solve my query, Ill give you a drink." Asks John cena.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Im sorry but Im dont normally drink with strangers. There are a variety of ways to solve your little dilemma. You could sing a romantic sonna, give her flowers, or give her candy. Also, you can use some diluted water from a love spring to create a love potion, but then she might fall in love with the pot. Im not usually the one to solve relationship problems, and you didnt truly ask a question. If you ask me, I say to be as sappy as you can and give into her every whim. Also, your ladyfriend wouldnt happen to actually BE a mundane mink, is she?" .

Q: " Why doesnt Surprise use a talent that will make her able to use the same talent more than once?" inquires henry, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "It is because she is growing up and wouldnt usually think of such a thing. Shes too worried about having fun. It also wouldnt be much of a surprise, either, would it? Now, I want you to read through your grammar book both backward and forward until you drill yourself perfectly." .

Q: Cocoanndoes boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "Will I ever get what I most desire? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "No one truly ever gets what they desire. If you got it, it wouldnt be much of a desire anymore. Now, run along and fetch me my slippers." .

Q: "Hi! I was just wondering, what is my talent? I cant fathom it. " asks Elfers after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "Hello, Elfers. Your talent is asking the unknown. You ask things that almost no one can answer. The reason that no one can answer them is because there meaning is so deep, they are hard to comprehend. Now, go out and gather me some Bs." .

Q: Isenet walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "If Peter Piper picked a patch of pickled peppers, wheres the patch of pickled peppers that Peter Piper picked? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "The tongue twister actually goes like this: Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers. A peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked. If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers, wheres the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked? The answer to this, though, cannot be answered in such a short time. That peck has been moved many places many times and is hard to keep track of. Now, your service is to pick a peck of pickled peppers for me. Im running low." .

Q: Ronaim asks the Magician: "When is the Xanth movie coming out? "
A: "The Xanth movie, titled A Spell for Chameleon, doesnt have a set date. Its currently in production and has a goal for the year 2008 in your Mundane time. Now, write me up a story or something for a play. I get bored easily." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "why is the sky falling? " Asks Natedogg.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "An invisible giant is sitting on it." .

Q: "what is the answer to the question I am going to ask? " inquires Vanring, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Thats a pair-a-docks. There is no answer to a question about that same question, because the question only links back to itself. Ill have you do me a years service anyways though, just for wasting my time." .

Q: demon-summoner Crain boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " Is somoning demons a magician caliber talent? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "not in your case, seeing how all of the demons you summon are 10 inches tall, and look rather a lot like pink ponies." .

Q: " What is my magic talant? " asks Kelsie_human after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "Your talent is repeating your actions on a daily basis. You do the same things over and over with little difference between days. Now, go repeat yourself by sweeping my entire castle." .

Q: Rybec walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " What is the name of a Xanthian plant that will cure headaches? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "There is only one sure-good way to cure a headache in Xanth. Buy some wheat seeds and other grains and plant them into a small field. Outside this field, put a sign that says My grain, not yours! When those seeds grow and are ready to be harvested, change the sign to say Your grain, not mine. to give your grain to someone else. Now, go weed out my garden, please." .

Q: Deamon asks the Magician: "why dont you just clone the people that ask you a question an make the clone work for a year then destroi the clone..(dotn say theres no way to clone somone!!its XANTH eny thing can happen. also dont say i havnt found out how to lcone. i know you have u knwo evry thing!)"
A: "I dont clone people because, while I do know how, the cloning method is tedious, exhausting and not worth it. Now Deamon, your service will help every single Xanthian. If everything is possible in Xanth, then why dont you learn to spell? Im signing you up for mandatory spelling courses for the whole year." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: " How many Xanth books are there probably going to be written in the end? I only know of 32 so far and 2 have yet to be written. " Asks Zigeunerweisen.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "The number of total Xanth books is at this point indefinite. Piers Anthony is a Xanthian whose talent both acts as blessing and a curse. Because of it he can write wonderfully punny novels, but his talent forces him to write one Xanth book every year. I suspect his talent will continue acting this way until he finally fades away. Knock on wood. Honestly, I thought everyone knew that? You will be one of my three challenges for a year. People will have to try to guess your name to gain entrance (that should stop the buggy little bastards)" .

Q: "Currently, where is the isthmus that connects Mundania and Xanth in Mundania? Or is is disconnected now? " inquires MiKe C., trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Right now it is in southern Europe, but by the time youve served your year of service, it will have moved, so that was a rather pointless question." .

Q: Dale Ashburn boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "How can I start a monkey-bar? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Youll need lots of upper body strength and some fleas before you could ever be successful with monkey-bars." .

Q: " (question)i dont really have a question... But I would like to know the meaning of life!! (TRY AND ANSWER THAT ONE!!!) " asks Safria after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "Forty-Two." .

Q: Hannah walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " How much woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Hed chuck all the wood that a woodchuck could if a woodchuck could chuck wood." .

Q: Magician Marcus asks the Magician: " Good Magician, before I ask my question, I thank you for taking the time to answer it. Anyway, Let me get right to the point like you want me to. How may I use my talent of True Sight to help the greatness that is Xanth? "
A: "I dont have time to answer your question, but thank you for taking the time to ask it." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: " Do you have a soul? " Asks Lucas.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "We both already know the answer to that." .

Q: " Where can I find the rare condom tree? I have 8 kids!!! " inquires Lucas, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "your local 7-11" .

Q: Lucas boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " If I had died when I tried to get in your castle, what would happen? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "I have a few sea monsters under my service that would be glad to eat your body, but we would save your socks to add to my collection" .

Q: " I want to know: What exactly is your talent? I just dont understand " asks Lucas after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "Information, As was described by my encounter with reverse wood (Source of Magic in the madness)" .

Q: Lucas walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " In hell, when you got Lacuana to write question quest on the wall, you never metioned much aout your family. I ask, who were the breeders of this great(and grumpy) magician? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "I think I did, didnt I mention my Brother who lived on the tic farm? Obvious... Wheres my socks!" .

Q: Skipps asks the Magician: " What question should I ask? "
A: "You should ask the question What question should I ask? And you did! Good job! Now skip on down to the kitchens and cook me up a sandwich" the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: " Seeeeeervus, old unsocksorted magican, heres my question: Yesterday a was biten by an alitteration and a hypothenuse. Now Im sick and I think Im poisened. What can I do that I wont die. " Asks JohnC.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "You should probably work on your thoughts, if a was bitten, you shouldnt get sick, now im going to send you on a quest to save Xanth... a VERY hard quest.." .

Q: " What are you doing here? Youre not the Good Magician! I am! Now get off this site or I will give everyone who asked you a Question their answer without them having to work for you for a year! " inquires Good Magician Humpfrey, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "You arent the good magician, I am! You are Nicole (from Renous, NB, Canada), and you asked another question 20 minutes before this one, with the same email address as nicole, and the same IP address! And you call yourself a Good Magician Impersonator! Humph." .

Q: Nicole from Renous, NB, Canada boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " Good Magician, why do you only answer Questions from dumb people that only waste your time? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "They are very good at diggin holes" .

Q: " Is there some way to allow me to get the webmasters of this website to stop being lazy and actually pay attention to the site every once and a while, and what is it? " asks Robster639 after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "Give them lots of money... :-D The webmasters take paypal..." .

Q: Elxzeee walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " I am Sorceresssssssss Elzxeee Why are you so short, you are so stupid too, and i am much smarter than you "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Im short, but I am smarter than you. Do you know why? Because I just charged you TWO years of service to me for that lousy question. Now go clean out my bedpans!" .

Q: Sans Demoness asks the Magician: " Magician, If i was living in Xanth, what would my talent be? "
A: "You have the talent of making any kind of food in any amount appear whenever you wish it." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: " What is the point of making people work for u for a year, if they alreayd worked so hard just to get in the castle? " Asks Robster639.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Because I can." .

Q: " Why are you called the Good magician, and not the grupmy-old-duffer-who-reads-all-Answers from a-Book-and-is-a-poor-excuse-for-a-gnome magician? All you do is answer pointless questions like mine, and charge a horrendous amount in turn as payment.Dont you have anything better to do? Yours In disrespect; Kid rock (Demon Isrespect or D.Isrespect) " inquires Kid_rock, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "I am called Good because I could be ruling the world with all of my knowledge, I instead answer pointless questions like yours for an enormously high time repayment to substitute for the time I lost not ruling the world and answering your question with!!" .

Q: De.fault boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "why do you make people do a year of service for one measly question? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Because I dont like to be bothered. Yes... I know, having people around for a whole year might sound bothersome to you, but at least they are doing chores instead of asking pesky questions." .

Q: "OH MY GOSH! ITS HIDEOUS! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH THE GOOD MAGICIAN?!" asks Gabria after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "I put him right here *points to himself*... And for that lip, youll be drawing a portrait of me during your years service." .

Q: Nymph2005 walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " where can i find a walkthrough for Journey into Xanth? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Youll be able to find it written on your desk, but first you have to write it, because there arent any in existance just yet. Make sure you send a copy to webmasters@xanthians.com once you are done." .

Q: John asks the Magician: " What is the maximum air speed velocity of an unladen swallow carrying a 5 pound acorn? And why wont people accept that maybe, just maybe God hates them? "
A: "The sparrow doesnt move because it cant carry a 5 pound acorn, imbecile! But we can test that theory: go get me ten years worth of socks! God hates no one, because I am your god!" the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "What is my talent?" Asks Naga_gurl_2005.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "What a simply and plain to-the point question. You talent is asking what you mean. For your answer, you shall be rewarded by sweeping my castle." .

Q: " Will Journey through Xanth or Companions of Xanth when downloaded off this site work on a Windows XP computer. " inquires Hannah, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Yes. But Windows XP wont be popular in a year, and since youll be spending the next year scrubbing the castle walls, your question was pointless." .

Q: Kid_rock boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " I am a mathematician named Alpha.To become King, I need to get the answers to these questions.
1)What is the distance between A and Z?
2)How much time does it take to get Away?
And finally; 3)What is the difference between Then and Now?
plz help,magician,when ill be king i will reward u.
"
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "The distance between A and Z is sqrt((A(x)-Z(x))^2+(A(y)-Z(y))^2)... If Away = A, Z = your location, and S is the speed in which you are traveling, then Time = sqrt((A(x)-Z(x))^2+(A(y)-Z(y))^2)*S. Then, being the time when you were at A before you went to Z, then the difference between Then and Now is sqrt((A(x)-Z(x))^2+(A(y)-Z(y))^2)*S minutes, sqrt((A(x)-Z(x))^2+(A(y)-Z(y))^2) miles, or 3 years, which is the amount of time youll be spending calculating where my socks go after I put them in the dryer. Now get to work." .

Q: " Why dont you wear pants? " asks dreaden after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "What an absurd question! I do wear pants, just not in the pictures you see me in because the artist is weird like that. For such a silly question, you must now clean my underpants and then sort them!" .

Q: Warsong walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " what is my magic talent looks into space and please be powerful "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Your talent is the talent of thinking big. You always think things will be greater than they are!!!" .

Q: Dolph007 asks the Magician: " How are you able to operate this by the com-pewter when the only one in xanth is Com-Pewter and he doesnt let you use him? "
A: "Because you idiot have you read ANY of the books? We have are online now you blithing idiot!" the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: " Hey, you old gnome... I need a pick up line and quick. " Asks Wish_i_was_dor.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes." .

Q: "why didn,t WIRA wellcome me in " inquires De.fault, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "WIRA didnt welcome you in because of your odd form of speech." .

Q: Demoness*sire boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " Am I beautiful? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "You people really should think out this questions more. What do you think I am? A mundane 8-ball? Or do you think of me as a mirror? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. There. That is my answer. Now, run off and clean the vanity located somewhere in my castle. Youll have to find it, because its pretty deep in the castle." .

Q: " Please tell me what my magical talent is! " asks Angelin44 after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "That isnt a question, you little whipper-snapper! You are demanding of me! Well, since you made it this far, I might as well tell you. Your magical talent is turning the mundane moose purple. Now, weed out the garden. It hasnt been done in a while, so watch out for danger." .

Q: Demoness*sire walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " why dont you just whash your feet instead of going through worlds of socks? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Are you accusing me of bad hygiene? Sometimes I just cant find the time to wash my feet, seeing as I have to answer ridiculous questions such as this! Now, for that, you must wash my feet." .

Q: D.metria asks the Magician: " What is my magical talent? "
A: "Whats you magic talent? Well, last time I checked, demons dont have magic talents. Now, please clean up the kitchen a bit." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: " Do you know of any goodonline or any type of computer Xanth games I can play, other than Companions, which I cant get to work, that you would share with me? " Asks D.metria.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Wow, two questions in a row. Sorry to disappoint you, but I only know of Companions. What a very odd game, that was. Go and wash the castle roof." .

Q: " (question)what is the cure for demon boredom? " inquires Demoness*Sire, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "You are a girl Demon, D Sire so Get on with it! Your job deals with the adult conspiracy which I cannot say in here! So start sorting my socks!" .

Q: D.grossclout boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. " Im going to a party this month (jewel-lye) and im suppose to bring the drink, i have an awsome drink panned, but i need to know, wheres the nearest boot rear spring available? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Its located 500 yards away from the right side of my castle. But now you wont be able to go the the party because you have to do your years service for me!" .

Q: " Why is it that a person can put six pairs of matching socks in the wash, and when they come out you will only have 4 pairs of mismatched socks??? " asks Dwcr13 after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "The washing machine is actually a creature of Xanth who has stored up magic and it is hungry so in return for cleaning your laundry it eats your socks. I got rid of mine years ago I have enough trouble with socks as it is." .

Q: Dolph007 walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, " How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "He wouldnt he would be asking dumb questions like you. " .

Q: Lindsay asks the Magician: " Who will I marry? "
A: "You will marry me... Talk to one of my 5 wives for instructions, Sofia is out today, so you can start sorting my socks... Well, GET TO IT, LINDSAY! My socks wont sort themselves!" the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: " what is my magic talent?? " Asks _____.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "You should have figured that one out when you wrote down your name! Your magic talent is to make your name invisible to others if it is written. Have fun with that." .

Q: "i already know my talent, but if you can guess correctly i will give you an answer you cant even fathom (i got the answer from x(a/n)th himself)... Try me" inquires Wish_i_was_dor, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "No." .

Q: cool handless luke boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "if xanth is located on the mundane region called florida, then how come there are no tangle trees in florida, I mean, xanth is a penninsula, so it must be attached to mundania, so that means florida is xanth, so that means florida is magic, but there are no tangle trees or stuff there, so how come? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "No, because There are different planes of existence, you silly mundane. " .

Q: "how many xanth books should I buy to read? " asks Suger Kitten after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "You should by all of them because half the profit goes to me! So go buy all of them and I won't charge you a year of service!" .

Q: Sabrina walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "if i had a magic talent, what would it be? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "To make all those around you smile." .

Q: Pip asks the Magician: "I am about to have a baby girl, what would be a fitting name to give to her?"
A: "Aislinn Rianne" the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "Could Grey nullify Bink's Talent? " Asks Dolin.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "No because the talent of Bink would accidently make him not be around him!" .

Q: "will there be a game about xanth on the ps2 or xbox or gamecube or anything like that? " inquires Berksboy, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "It will if you start e-mailing the game companys about it." .

Q: Undertaker boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "MR. MAGICIAN.I RESPECT YOU.I M NOT LIKE THAT JERK JOHN CENA.I EVEN HAVE A MAGICIAN-CLASS TALENT,I CANNOT DIE NORMALLY.I AM A DEAD MAN. MY QUESTION:-I HAVE FALLEN IN LOVE WITH A GIRL IN MY AREA.BUT I AM A DEAD MAN,HOW CAN I MARRY HER AND HAVE KIDS? IN ALL ANTICIPATION; UNDERTAKER [R.I.P.] "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Look Mr. Undertaker, YOU DONT HAVE TO SHOUT. Since I'm guessing you're some sort of zombie just get some potion from the zombie master. But first I need you to throw all of my old socks into the void and to harvest some new ones from a sock tree. Then tell the Zombie Master I said it was okay. OKAY??" .

Q: "How do I get rich? " asks Lady_rio after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "Go loot a money tree." .

Q: Marriette walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "I need to reapply my lipstick around 3 times a day, how can I put it on in the morning and still have it looking fresh in the evening without reapplying so often?"
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Get some water from teh fountain of youth and put it into your lipstick or lipgloss it will last much longer." .

Q: D.grossclout asks the Magician: "This is a hard question, and yes I should know it but... if demons disappear into dust devils when there is no magic, then in the time of no magic, all the demons should have changed into dust devils, lost cohesion and be destroyed. How did the demons survive?"
A: "Xanth is a land of mystery, even at the time of no magic demons obtained enough of it in their bodies to stay in tact." the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "Do you care about anything other than your socks? " Asks Spader458.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Yes as a matter of fact I do. I care about the good of Xanth. For free I'll tell you what I do not like. Rude people telling me that I do not care about anything but my socks. I also do not like people who ask annoying questions." .

Q: "hello GM I am sorry to disturb you but I am here to ask you what my magic talent is because I heared that when I asked last time that your sources were liars " inquires prince dor, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "You can talk to the inaminate. I am sorry that you have not realized that until now. You must be either deaf or extremely stupid." .

Q: ECB boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "Is there any way to stop the mad decent into a muck of puns that the Xanth series has taken? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "(answer)You're a pungently ignorant fool! Your punphobia is a disgrace to the punness of Xanth. I'm sorry but like I told Bink there is no way in pun's end that I can help you. NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!" .

Q: "when bink went in search of the origin of magic and all magic dissapeared how did the centaurs breath when it is stated by che centaur that the only way a centaur could breath was through magic??? " asks Axman232000 after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "It just proves that centaurs can be wrong. Or that maybe not all of the magic disappeared. Even I can't find the answer to that!" .

Q: D.grossclout walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "How can i become a evily cunning demon, and free up my afternoon? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Make yourself into more than one person. You're a demon you can do that. You are also supposed to be one of the smartest demons. So much for that idea." .

Q: Spader458 asks the Magician: "Is there any way I can go on a quest that will benefit Xanth. "
A: "Yes, you can find a way to keep my socks clean permanetly then I might not be so grouchy!" the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "How can I properly go about causing as much mischief as possible without getting caught?? " Asks Demon Viant.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Ask Prince Dor, I've told him the answer, now go give this message to Grossclout." .

Q: "GM wats mi magic talent if u tell me the exrtremaly right answer i will give you 8 years service " inquires Prince dor, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "Bad spelling. Now go help Sofia sort my socks, for eight years!" .

Q: Prince dor boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "is life a game you can use cheats to get through? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Along as no one gets hurt, you don't get caught, and I'm never bothered again. Now leave before I notify the king of your intention to cheat." .

Q: "Will i have a good and happy life, or will i take over xanth? " asks Prince dor after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "You will do neither! I will be kind enough to give you one extra answer without price, too. You will be kind at first, then you are overtaken by evil after talking with a rude Harpy who says there is riches and abandoned castles waiting to be ruled somewhere around the Lake Ogre Chobee and there you will be killed!" .

Q: Guinevere_Sorceress_of_Ilusion13 walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "How old are you really? "
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "Well I'm not sure why you ask, but if you must know I am 171 years old. I can thank my youth to a lethe elixir that has allowed me to keep my physical form at the perfect age of 91." .

Q: Amanda asks the Magician: "how can I get to xanth and live there?"
A: "well, youre in xanth if you can ask me anything, Amanda! I am suprised at this Xanthians stupidity! Now serve your time reading me my books!" the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "why do hot dogs come in packages of 10 and hot dog buns come in packages of 8. " Asks Ledreamers.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "Because, the hot dog bun people want you to give them money!" .

Q: "Good magician, I am a mundane homosexual simeltaneously looking for love and my magical talent. What must I do besides coming to you for help in order to further my quest? " inquires Elijah, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "I suggest using e-harmony.com. Your magical talent is the talent to find love online. There are millions of homos in Mundane World- sadly, you will find only Ducky as one of them in Xanth" .

Q: Nyasa boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "How many Mundanes actually reside in Xanth? "
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "Many because at one point in time all were mundanes!" .

Q: "When will we catch Bin Laden? " asks Asoldier after a long journey into the castle.
A: The Good Magician replies in a harsh tone: "As soon as one of your less-idiotical mundane friends comes and asks me where he is instead of when you will catch him" .

Q: Axman232000 walks into the Good Magicians laboratory and quickly delivers his question, "when can I go flying pig hunting with my trusty canary bird dog???"
A: Peering over a book, the old gnome mumbles "What an absolutly stupid question. You can never take a canary bird dog to hunt a flying pig they don't chace after flying pigs they go for Canary birds. Now you can start your year of service by washing my socks!" .

Q: Darathinas asks the Magician: " What is MY magical talent? I hate Mundania! Help me discover it so I can join everyone in Xanth! "
A: "Your magical talent is to be able to transform from human form to worm form without losing your intellectual abilities. Now go begone or find me my socks!" the good magician replies as he shuffles some things around in search of socks.

Q: "What must I do to find my magical talent? " Asks Dor-man.
A: The Good Magician flatly replies, "The best way to find out your magic talent is to ask me what it is. I could tell you now if you wish, but then you will be serving two years in my castle." .

Q: "Will there ever be a Xanth movie created? It would make a AWESOME movie!" inquires X(a/n)th, trying to get a good look at the short man hiding behind his kitchen counter.
A: The Good Magician breaks his dentures on a bite of corn, and after a bleeped out words he finally mumbles back: "I may be the magician of information, but even I cannot seperate fact from fiction as far as showbiz and movies are concerned. I just finally figured out why my magic mirror refused to play VHS tapes- there seems to be a sock jammed in there. I managed to get it out, but there is so much jam on the sock now I can no longer wear it." .

Q: D-light boldly approaches the gnome and demands his questions be answered. "How many licks DOES it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?"
A: The Good Magician flips through his book of answers and replies: "It takes about 157 licks give or take the salivation of your mouth. Now you can serve your year of service by mucking out the dragon dung from the basement." .

Xanthians Online would like to thank these sites:
Magician Humfreys Castle, XLV˧ Xanth Page

      The sites above have answered questions from fans from the year 2000-2002. Both sites are now inactive, but Xo has picked up the slack with this section!

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